e·ra·sure

Hapa Mag - AUGUST 26, 2020

By Jazmine Jarvis

 
A mixed woman stands on the pier on a river. She has her hands on her head. She is wearing gold jewelry, ankh earrings, and a black durag. She's also wearing a black top and multicolored pants

You ask me to “prove it.”

Prove my blackness.

Prove my gayness.

Prove my whiteness.

Prove my straightness.

As if I’m a walking question mark.

A scientific study.

A multiple choice test with too many answers selected.

“Pick one” you demand.

You say I’m confused but really I’m just confusing.

Confusing to you, who live inside boxes.

Confusing to you, who can’t comprehend paradoxes.

Confusing to you, who only wants one answer.

Confusing to you, who only wishes to master.

Does my ambiguity offend you?

Does my fluidity disturb you?

Does my duality challenge you?

You make assumptions about my race based on how I look or how I sound.

You make assumptions about my sexuality based on who I’m dating or who’s around.

But the truth is, no matter what you assume,

I am always mixed. I am always bi.

Even when I’m light as can be or dating a guy.

I am always mixed. I am always bi.

Even when my skin is dark and my girlfriend’s shy.

I am always mixed. I am always bi.

Even when you judge me before I even say hi.

I am always mixed. I am always bi.

 
The logo for "Mixed in America," which comprises of the letters "MIA" against skin-toned blocks

Mixed in America (MIA) empowers the Mixed community and heals the Mixed identity. MIA is run by two multiracial activists, Jazmine Jarvis and Meagan Kimberly Smith, looking to have a more nuanced conversation about race in America.Embracing duality is not easy. The resulting wounds are oftentimes invalidated, misunderstood, and ignored, leaving us with very few resources to assist in authentic healing. Mixed in America aims to provide these resources and facilitate spaces to remedy these complex challenges. mixedinamerica.org